


I think I'm better when I'm with you but I worry when you're gone

by hllfire



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Angst, Fix-It, Fluff, M/M, au - eddie lives, eddie is alive you fools that ending was a sham
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-15
Updated: 2020-01-15
Packaged: 2021-02-24 18:21:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22262368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hllfire/pseuds/hllfire
Summary: "It was another night where he couldn't sleep. One more to his list ever since leaving Derry once more, this time for good. He swore to himself he would never step into that place again, even if It was finally dead. The bad memories always would win against the good ones that Derry had provided him. One particular bad memory was the reason he wasn't being able to sleep that night, a memory that kept coming back again, and again, and again, as if his mind set it to play on loop in a morbid joke that he didn't find funny at all. "
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 2
Kudos: 30





	I think I'm better when I'm with you but I worry when you're gone

**Author's Note:**

  * For [reddierly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/reddierly/gifts).



> Title from the song Ultimately by Khai Dreams.
> 
> This is just a small fix-it fic because I hate the gay homophobic clown movie for being homophobic and killing one of the gays. This is, again, for Ash because he deserves it.
> 
> Enjoy the gaysTM.

The room was dark and silent, the small sound of breathing being the only one filling the room. Richie liked that sound, specially because it came mostly from Eddie. He was so concentrated on watching Eddie breathe that sometimes he forgot to do it himself, often taking deep breaths out of nowhere to refill his lungs with the much needed oxygen, only to stop breathing again as he saw the light movements of Eddie's chest as it went up and down over and over again. 

It was another night where he couldn't sleep. One more to his list ever since leaving Derry once more, this time _for good_. He swore to himself he would never step into that place again, even if _It_ was finally dead. The bad memories always would win against the good ones that Derry had provided him. One particular bad memory was the reason he wasn't being able to sleep that night, a memory that kept coming back again, and again, _and again_ , as if his mind set it to play on loop in a morbid joke that he didn't find funny at all. 

The dark cave in the sewers of Derry still haunted him, the spikes made of stone, the Death Lights floating around while a disgusting _spider-version_ of Pennywise tried to kill each one of his friends, including himself. Richie was slow there, got caught by the lights like Beverly had been twenty seven years ago and was shown the cause of his nightmares to this day. 

He saw Eddie throwing something at Pennywise, freeing him from his state of trance and hurting the alien-spider-clown — Richie wasn't sure of what to call that motherfucker yet, it was all very confusing. He saw Eddie run to him in a hurry, celebrating what he had done and that he saved Richie. And then he saw Eddie die _right in front of him_. His breath was caught again as he remembered the vision, remembering Eddie being thrown around mercilessly through the cave while Richie could do nothing but watch. It had been so real, it _hurt_ like it was real.

When Richie woke up from the trance Pennywise had put him on, his heart stopped for a moment as he saw Eddie repeating the same words he had said on his vision.

" _Hey Rich, wake up-_ " every word seemed to weigh a thousand pounds on Richie's chest as he saw Eddie's excitement. " _Hey, Richie, listen! I think I got him man… I think I killed it… I did!_ "

There they were. The words that came before Eddie's inevitable death. One more phrase and he would be gone and there would be nothing Richie could do. So he didn't wait any longer. His mind was still blurry, confused, but he had a goal that was more important that the confusion in his mind. Before Eddie could say what would be his last phrase before being stabbed by the clown that ruined their lives all those years ago, Richie held him close to his chest and _rolled_ to his left. The sound of something piercing against the ground where he and Eddie were moments ago made Richie's body shiver.

" _Holy shit._ " Eddie managed to say before getting up, pulling Richie with him as Pennywise still tried to kill anyone that he could reach with his sting.

Richie was able to stop the vision the Death Lights had given him, but it didn't mean that the vision didn't stuck with him. _If he had hesitated for a moment longer_ …

He took a deep breath again, feeling like all the air had left his lungs and felt a few tears fill his eyes as de looked to Eddie's face, his hands shaking as they grabbed the bed sheets tightly. The scar on his cheek was now a lot better ever since he was stabbed by Bowers. Richie couldn't stop himself from thinking that what happened with Bowers in that bathroom was a sick premonition of what was to come for Eddie later, just a taste of what the man would have to deal with before dying. 

But he didn't die, and now they were there, together, in Eddie's apartment, supposedly resting after a long day of Eddie doing his work and helping Richie do _his_ work. A smile came to Richie's face as he remembered earlier that day, both of them discussing in the living room about the comedian's next show, writing down the material for it. It was one of the first times ever since the beginning of his career that Richie wrote his own jokes, and he couldn't be happier to be doing it with Eddie. He was incredibly funny, much to Richie's delight, and helped the comedian to polish his content _a lot_. He was happy, but that vision, that morbid memory, still stuck to him, sucking all the happiness and turning it into worry.

_What if Richie hadn't reacted?_

"Lost something on my face?" Eddie's sleepy voice threw Richie back to reality as he noticed the other man's eyes staring at him in the dark. "You should be sleeping."

"You too, and yet here we are." Richie tried to smile but Eddie didn't smile back, instead examining his _boyfriend_ — that word was still weird for both of them, but it felt good — to try and find what was troubling him.

"Are you thinking about Pennywise again?" Richie kept silent, groaning softly. Eddie took his hand to his boyfriend's face, running his thumb over his cheek softly. "I'm not going anywhere…"

"Of course you aren't, this is your home-"

"Richie…"

He stopped the jokes, his eyes turning slightly sadder as he traced the scar on Eddie's cheek. "If I hadn't reacted the moment I did…"

"But you _did_. You saved me." Eddie took his hand, taking it away from his scar and placing a kiss on the palm of his boyfriend's hand softly, his eyes closing for a moment before looking back at Richie's worried eyes. "It's over now. I'm not going _anywhere_."

Richie hesitated, staring for a while longer into Eddie's eyes before feeling himself calming down. He was there. Both of them were. And it would stay like that. Eddie wasn't going anywhere.

The smaller man pulled Richie softly, hugging him tightly while Richie pressed his face to Eddie's neck, holding him in his arms and feeling the calm he only felt when he was in his boyfriend's arms. He was safe there, and so was Eddie. 

That night, Richie didn't have nightmares.

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave a comment if you enjoyed it, it helps me a lot to keep writing!


End file.
